Looking back can be hard on your psyche. We all have skeletons and ghosts that we would rather not revisit. Last week I asked you to look back and think about people, places and relationships that you left behind.   I asked that you think about opportunities or situations that made you not look your best.  Did you think about situations where you could have handled things better; could have been more understanding; could have been more compassionate; had the opportunity to use adversity to have shown others that you really cared?  I once read a fictional interview with George Washington where he was asked about what he would do differently about chopping down the cherry tree. His response was, “I would have spent more time sharpening my axe.”  Recently, I had to use an older expression I have not used in a while: “A problem well defined is half solved.”  Both of these remind me that this is why I want to spend so much time on the front end of your transformation process around the subjects of who you are, who you were, and who/what you want to be.  The rest of our journey is a waste of time if you are not 100% committed, and highly motivated, toward your goal. That goal also has to be consistent with who you want to be. Who you REALLY are. 

This Week’s Talk

At this point in the story, Scrooge is out on his rounds with the Ghost of Christmas Past.  Scrooge is at the boarding school observing the Scrooge he was as a child. We see that he was isolated while at school and often sought escape and refuge from this sad existence by reading books and becoming engrossed in the story.  Scrooge vividly recalls characters from the stories he read. He calls out descriptions of Ali Baba, Robinson Crusoe, and the colorful parrot.  In one of the movie versions, Scrooge is told by the spirit that these characters are not real. Scrooge responds that they are to the boy and then describes these characters with amazing detail.  This is the power of having a very vivid, emotional, multidimensional image to put in your head.  Many decades later Scrooge still thinks of these characters as if the were real and as if he was a part of the adventure in the book.  It is also true with the images you have of who the future you is. Give these thoughts and visions enough mental energy and clarity and they will prople your life to amazing places.

You mission through this entire transformational journey is to be vividly clear on who you are, who you want to be and how that person behaves.  There is a bit of a chicken-egg relationship in personal growth and development.  Attitudes and values drive behaviors but you can also develop the values and attitudes by displaying the behaviors and believing in them.  Much as the characters in Scrooges books were not real, yet his mind believed in them, the same is true for who you are. Who you tell your mind, your soul, and your spirit that you are and how that person behaves, your brain will treat these beliefs as real.  If you can effectively be the person that you want to be by displaying those behaviors then you will develop the values and beliefs that drive those behaviors.  As your conscious mind reviews that your beliefs and behaviors are congruent, the behaviors will be reinforced as the who that you want to be helps anchor those values.  It is an echo chamber where the stronger you believe, and the stronger you can define the why of what you want, the faster and more completely you will get there.

This Week’s Assignment

Who, what, when, where, why and how. These are not only parts of a good story they are the essential DNA of your personal transformation.  Your journey starts as a story in your head. For this week’s assignment, I am asking you to pick one of your future behaviors and then write a very colorful, highly detailed scenario around you displaying this behavior.  What are you doing, how are you doing it, why are you doing it, what are you thinking while this happens, what are you feeling, what values do you want this to display? How will others perceive you? What is the outcome? During the coming week, perform this behavior as often as you can. While you are in this mode, recall all these details that you described.

See you next week…